Life is a Highway - it’s the journey, not the destination

have been up and down like a rollercoaster

Started late last night with me in tears about being up here. Not that I’m really unhappy about the decision, I still do think it’s a better idea than staying where we were and not going *anywhere* in our lives. But it’s been such an upheaval and I’m so struggling to get back to where I want to be. I miss all my friends so much and what I need to do is get my finger out and start blogging, commenting and trying to keep in touch again. But I can’t. I’m feeling so pushed to the limit with my OU course, finances getting me down, you know the general crap. And by the time the evening comes I just want to sit with James and forget everything, not rehash it on a computer screen! It’s a habit I really need to get back into Please keep kicking me up the bum about it, I need it.

James is also down about having his friends so far away. He feels he’s always the one who’s chasing them to chat (which was always the way even before we moved) and it’s getting to him. Wish I could help him.

I’vem oved the pc into the living room for a bit so I can try and keep up more anyway. Couldn’t get the bloody wireless working at all. Makes me mad all that technology that I can’t work out

It was a good start to the day though as we were off to the Home ed group we went to last week with my friend from up the road. I do really like the group and it’s dynamics. I think it helps there’s a little soft play area that the kids can jump around in (and out of sight too!). today they did some silk painting, some sunflower seed planting and parachute games. They’ve fitted in really well which gives me a smug feeling in the face of people who aren’t agreeing with HE for whatever reason.

The first phone call I got from James brought good news. My first assignment came back from the OU (seemed to take forever and my next one is due soon now!) and I did really well getting 78% Art history and Philosophy seem to be my strong points, whereas Sonnets and Music weren’t so much. Also got a cheque from the Students Assistance fund for help with my bits and bobs I need for my course since I’m getting no help from anywhere else. I was so near giving up the course but knowing I’ve had this little bit coming means I think I can keep it up for now. I mean we’re not hugely skint, but not exactly flush either and I always put everyone else first. So havign alittle fund of money just for me and my studies is good.

Secodn phone call was not so good. The house sale has fallen through. I just knew this would happen and it makes me so angry it’s taken this long for the b*stards to come and say so. So now it’s back on the market. Fingers crossed it will sell again and soonish. I just want rid of the house and all it’s bills

Home ed wise we’ve not done too much. A bit of talking about Romans and the Colisseum which is what I’m studying about now, but that’s about it really. Might sneak some in at the weekend when we’re planning on visitign Edinburgh castle

Mum and Dad are up next week for my birthday so a bit of a change and I’m looking forward to it.

Every day I say to myself “I’ll blog that” and by the time I get to the evening I just don’t bother.

Things are going ok though, feeling slightly over my wobblies last week. Actually moving anywhere with the house sale would make me so much happier but it’s nearly going backwards!! The buyers haven’t even sorted their mortgage or paid any money to their solicitors for the searches yet Our estate agents have told them if they don’t get their fingers out we’ll stick the house back on the market. Ugh, really don’t want that, I just want it over with. Not least cos I may have some money. All seems a distant hope atm.

Our trip down south last week was lovely, if a bit manic. Spent all the journey down and back listening to War of the Worlds, which is the new favourite in this house. I’ve never really heard it before even though James has had it on CD. Marcus absolutely adores it and it’s sparked loads of conversations about martians, aliens, planets and all stuff like that. I *will* derive some educational value from it all!!!

Alex has been so accident prone lately it’s unreal. Yesterday so trapped her arm in the kitchen drawer, banged her head on the work surface, was pushed off a bike by Marcus (Ok so that wasn’t an accident) and then burnt her finger on a lamp. Today she’s been scratched by one of our cats (I never did mention we got cats did I??) on her mouth, fell over and banged her head on a bench at a park, and, wellI suppose this isn’t an accident either, but she ran across a busy road all by herself when I was too far away to stop her. Oh that child! She is so headstrong, I just can’t trust her anymore. Marcus I know would *never* do anything like that just because he’s had a strop. I never know what Alex might do.

So yeah, about the cats. We have 2. They came with the house really and we decided to keep them to keep the mouse population down (and as their presents indicate, it’a a good job we have them as there are definitely mice somewhere. Not our house as far as I know, but there’s a few barns that probably have them - ugh). One girl called Dotty and a boy called Frosty. I’m not really a pet person though so can’t get too excited about them!

Still loads of runing around going on, but I’m trying to keep myself happy with the fact that both my 2 seem really happy, health and not behind any of the NC levels, not that they should make much difference, but sometimes it’s nice to keep an eye on it. Have realised though that up here Marcus would be a year behind. He’d be in Primary 1 now (reception), but in Doncaster would have been in Year 1.

he’s found the router!! See I’m useless!!! Now to find all the cables….

and a wee bit lonely. I think my trip down *home* at the weekend has just brought about how far away I am from everyone.

I wish I could find my bloody router so I can set up my laptop so I can keep in touch with friends *and* see James on an evening.

I wish my bloody house would complete (ha! not likely soon!) so we could have some money

and if the kids could act like normal human beings for a day that would be nice too. Am very close to selling them on ebay atm

Sorry. Normal service shall be resumed shortly.

as we’ve done some good bits of HE today.

oh I remember I was supposed to blog something else Marcus did. We’ve been doing quite a bit of number practising lately after I fretted about him not being able to count to 20. I think he’s almost there with it now, just requires practise I suppose. Anyway, he brought in some paper the other day, drew a grid on it and wrote 10. Then he said he was going to count in 10’s and with a bit of help got started with the first few and then he spotted the pattern and was able to do the rest up to 140 with minimal help. PMM

Yesterday we tried a card game getting 2 cards (1-9) and making them into 10. Seemed quite long as I keep expecting them to just *get* it and remember the number bonds. Anyway Marcus wanted to do it again today - strange how the most boring and simple games are loved eh? - and he decided to do numbers adding to 9 so we did that and he did so much better. He’s remembering what makes that number before and trying that. And it’s all number counting practice too

Did a bit of reading practice after and he seems to have had a similar brainwave about words in that if he’s read it before perhaps he can remember it rather than just sounding out again. He’s coming along nicely with it all. We’re practicing with the Sonlight “I can read it” books which some people I know have hated, but tbh they seem to be doing the job right now. I mean he’s still not hugely enthusiastic, he doesn’t scream about wanting to learn to read NOW, but he’s very happy to do some reading practice most days so it’s not been a struggle.

Marcus then wanted to do another card game so I taught him a simplified version of patience which he loved. Must learn more card games!!!! I don’t know any others!

So feeling much better about HE. I’ve been really down about the whole thing and have even been contemplating school. Not because of education, but because I feel that almost every day we run around doing errands and not doing anything decent. I just wonder sometimes if they’ll look back on their childhood and think what a boring life they led

well after last blog about snow that lasted half an hour and was gone I could be forgiven for not getting excited when James said it was snowing outside at 6am this morning.

Then I woke up and saw this out of my bedroom window:

so that’s been a cause for excitement!!

Have had a bit of a rotten week tbh and been feeling a bit down and crap. Not helped by an OU assignment needing finished a couple of days after they told me I wouldn’t be getting my £250 grant I had been expecting, just because I moved to Scotland. Grrr. Mind you it’s done now after staying up till 2am to do it.

Kids have been so cheeky and annoying all week. Some good HE moments which I’ll have to document later. Struggling so much to keep on top of the blog. I was hoping to get a new router so I could use my laptop in the living room for internet purposes and I was going to use my £250 grant, but well I suppose I’ll not be getting that now. Well not yet anyway. Grr and double grrr.

We’ve decided we’re popping down to Doncaster next weekend to see family so we’re looking forward to that.

we have snow!!! Kids out making the most of it now

Been a busy few days and haven’t quite got round to updating. Monday I spent the morning round town getting banking down and getting the kids some new shoes. Seems ages since they had them and surprise, surprise - their feet still haven’t grown!!! Anybody would think I was stunting their growth!!! Still we got some new shoes anyway and Alex is most impressed with the brightest pink pair and Marcus loves his that have lights in them!!

In the afternoon we started digging over a bit in the garden I’ve decided is going to be the veggie plot. Took ages and we didn’t do it all, but little bit at a time is probably a good idea. It’s bloody freezing round here anyway! No snow though

Yesterday C came round, the lady who I said lived up the road. Really excited to have met her and she seems lovely. She has a little girl who is justa tiny bit older than Alex and a boy who is 2 and a half. Kids had a ball running round and chasing each other. We got on so well we decided to go together to the home ed group I was planning on going to today at North Queensferry.

So that’s what we’ve done today. Seems a nice little group with gorgeous views over the Forth road and rail bridges. Seems a few boys around Marcus’s age too which is good, especially after the whole female HE scene that seems to go on They made pictures with some craft stuff while we were there, played in the little soft play area and afterwards we did some parachute games. Normally my idea of hell, but was ok Think we’ll go back to this one It’s every 4 weeks and as C has a 7 seater we can go together and split the costs. Cool.

Marcus is now playing with lego very quietly and Alex is in the bath so I better go. Have tutorial tonight for my OU course so also need to check where that is!